new guy?

The Cornel chapter is already done..

although i must admit, i sometimes still missing the way he treated me...

hmmm where do i begin?

mas Andri..

i knew you accidentally.. back when i was at the verge of denial of still having Cornel in my life..

yet, after several months, our path is crossed for a reason now that i'm with you...

it's not easy being with you.. i didnt get all the girlfriend's treatment.. all i did was pushed pushed and pushed you until you are mine.. and after i thought i have you, well i still have to pushed and pushed and pushed to get to know you even better...

sometimes i miss how Cornel used to treat me mas Andri, for this i'm sorry..

he used to took care of me like a lot, checking me everywhere i go, checking me out whether i was already home or even just a simple gestures asking what am i doing...

with you? it's different.. i did all the talking.. i did all the communications.. while you, just replying my efforts.. you even "disappear" for a while...

the strange thing is.. i dont know what really happened to me, but i just keep calm, of course i missed you, of course i was searching for you, but not in a hush way like the way i usually did...

i drank less, i went out less.. not because you told me not to, but because u told me what if i did that for my own good being...

but sometimes, there are times.. i wanna tell you i miss you, hell i wanna tell you i love you.. but somehow it was never came through..

what's wrong with me? what's wrong with us? did i make the wrong choice? did i make the wrong move?

it's a question i myself still figuring out what's the answers..

so if somewhere along the way you could tell me what it is.. please do..

i'm tired of searching the perfect one in my life.. i'm just searching the right one..

i hope it's you..